Familia Cedeño

Hello! It has been a very long time, hasn't it? Well, I have had lots of time to think, lots of time to learn and to mature in my life. The last entry that I wrote, I was still coming off of the high, manic state that I was in. I had been put on an anti psychotic medication and about a month later, the high wore off and the depression settled back in. It began with thoughts like, "I don't feel at home here." We had lived in our new house for about a month. I had not mentally prepared for this move since the decision had been made while I was in the mental hospital. Roberto felt very strongly that moving was the best thing for us at the time and so, we did. Several people had mentioned to Roberto that getting a job might benefit me. Since we have been married and had Samuel, I dedicated my time at home with him. I had no plans of working outside of the home after having Abram. So when he approached me about getting a job, I became anxious and even though I ...

I absolutely LOVE living in Daybreak. Since the very first Sunday that we went to our new ward and met a family called the Broadbent family, we have felt so at home and we consider ourselves very lucky to be here. The first few nights and mornings I would wake up and think...is this really my house? It felt so good I had to remind myself that the brand new, beautiful, large home that I was living in was actually mine. As I promised, here are photos of our new home: I am very grateful and I am happy to say that after very, very, very hard times come the very, very, very good times. 

We had another great day together as a family here in the beautiful community of Daybreak. The weather makes us want to go outside and play a lot. We are grateful for Roberto's flexible work schedule and his availability to take us out and spend time with us. I feel like we are starting from the beginning again. I was telling my mom this afternoon, that instead of feeling like I should be celebrating Abram's first birthday, it feels like it has been two or more years that have past, because of all of the illness, both physical and mental that I have experienced in the past year. Honestly, though, going through all of the pain and suffering and testing and trial of our love and relationship, has made it mean that much more to us and has given me a more firm testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ and of my eternal marriage and partnership with Roberto, the love of my life. I am so grateful for modern medicine, for psychiatrists and for technology. I want to take a min...

Hey there ... So, I am still going to the library to write because we have no internet in the house. I think I can finally understand to some degree what I have experienced in the past twelve months. Since the birth of my son, I have experienced depression, anxiety and then mania and lots more of anxiety in the extreme of every emotion I have encountered, which is why I was labeled bipolar in the mental hospital. I still don't know if that is the exact term that I would use for what I have gone through. Considering my son is still a little baby who has two months left until his first birthday, I think what I have gone through is called Postpartum Psychosis. I just watched a documentary on YouTube about this, this morning, and I am pretty sure that I can say this is the label. Women who have extreme thoughts of killing themselves or their baby after the birth of the baby. I really didn't think of killing myself but I was doing things that were putting myself into...

Well... here it goes...the ugly post I really didn't want to do this but I just have to say.... What an embarrassment I was during my manic episodes... I can't believe I actually believed that I was pregnant with twins and I posted about it on social media as if it was real.... I apologize right now to anyone that I may have hurt unintentionally. I was not in my right mind and I had absolutely no control over my actions. I still don't know if I am clinically bipolar or if was just situational since I completely hallucinated everything and my body believed it and so I had the belly.... It is a little confusing to me, but since I have discovered my food sensitivities, it makes more sense now why I was so bloated, but I think it was more my mind over my body. Again, I am sorry for what I did when I was psychotic. It was fun while it lasted. Now...... onto real life.

Hey! So this post goes out to everyone who has ever felt bloated and sick to their stomachs.... Yeah, doesn't sound so appetizing I know, but, I will continue to share with you why I said the V word. I am twenty eight years old. I was diagnosed with Addison's disease at the age of 25 and now.... I get sick every time I eat meat, dairy or gluten. WHAT THE BLEEP?! I am very frustrated to say the least. I am ready to start this new venture and I will definitely share with you my recipes and my fails. I will be using Pinterest as my guide and I really hope that this means I will be feeling better soon. Till next time...